Wednesday, September 10, 2008

A Split Second After the Big Bang


CERN launches world's largest particle collider ~ The Large Hadron Collider at CERN passed its first key tests today, firing two proton beams in opposing directions around a 17-mile underground ring. Scientists hope to use the collider to recreate the conditions a split second after the Big Bang.

Maoww...okay, the Kougar is being a bit naughty here. It was just too good....or, was it good for you? Or, was it a preemptive strike and now after the BIG BANG, there's no more bang left in the Buck. Let alone, no more bang for your Buck...since the only 'bang' he'll get now, is the bang of the door in his face. After you scorch him with a glare, especially if he's buck naked. So, one might suppose he's going have to go bang the 'buck' elsewhere...and maybe 'bang' by himself...like on Conan last night when Conando was left to bang the 'little pinata' after Chuck Norris came to the rescue...never mind. It's not a complicated plot...unlike life.
Of course, a split second after the big bang could mean the creation of new life...as in a pregnancy, human or as in the birth of a universe.
Yep, that's what those made physicists at CERN want to create with their super duper 'big gun' collider. The big bang. Talk about the ultimate wet dream...heck, they've got the biggest gun in the entire known world. At least, the world we've been allowed to know about. Not the world hidden in the deepest darkest shadow government. You know, where tricky Dicky Cheney hangs out most of the time, that is, when he's not lurking in the shadows, sneering like a good fella for the TV cameras.
Yep and roar...power up that 'big gun' and then pump out those crazy dazed particles into 17 miles of experimental womb. That ought to put a new bounce in your mad scientists' step.
Hey, anyone think to put a big gun lock on that thing, so it just doesn't explode particles. Get it's big gun off. Whenever. However. At the drop of a sexy experimental idea.
Yeah, that's the expensive ticket. Hire a the world's fiercest dominatrix. She can whip that 'big gun' into shape, into obedience.
Okay, the Kougaress must stop here...or she will bend your ear on and on and on...unless, that first baby black hole gobbles us all up. Its first cosmic snack. Yum. Belch! What else is out there. Venus or Mars first...oh yum, was that the moon?

CERN collider synchronicity ~ what was the Kougar paw-penning as she read the official news announcement? Hold onto your Big Cat fur...one of moi's heroes was firing an ice plasma missile from a pulse cannon into the eye of monster tornado, which lessens the tremendous force of the twister.
Yowl about firing up a big gun...so there, CERN physicists. Why don't you do some real good for humanity? Instead of pumping out your poor misdirected egos.

Now for the laugh portion of this evening's blog. A caveat, the Kougar is not usually into crass ass humor...however...this was sent by a friend, and is just too amusing...

We all know those cute little computer symbols called 'emoticons,' where: :) means a smile
and :( is a frown.
Sometimes these are represented by:-) & :-(
Well, how about some 'BUTTICONS?
'Here goes:

(_!_) a regular ass

(__!__) a fat ass

(!) a tight ass

(_*_) a sore ass

{_!_} a swishy ass

(_o_) an ass that's been around

(_x_) kiss my ass

(_X_) leave my ass alone
(_zzz_) a tired ass

(_E=mc2_) a smart ass

(_$_) Money coming out of his ass

(_?_) Dumb Ass

You have just been e-mooned!

A smooch after the Big Bang...from the Kougar...

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